Cheating and Reality TV

Yeah, people like to call it ‘reality tv’ but the fact is it’s scripted. There is more room for ad-libbing than in a totally scripted show, but when it comes down to it, it follows a script and a pattern. So does an affair.

There are sometimes stand-ins for the participants when things don’t look quite right and have to be re-filmed. At those times, it’s usually a close up of part of a person, like hands. Or a far away crane shot. An affair is much like this, where the affair partners either just look at bits and pieces or look at it from such a distance they can’t see the details that truly make a person recognizable for who they are.

While these shows are going on, it becomes the participants reality. They go through character changes that sometimes make them unrecognizable to their loves ones watching from the outside. They often change their morality to fit the situation, using whatever justification they can come up with. This is just like the funhouse mirror you see when looking at an active wayward spouse.

There’s usually the promise of a prize that is worth all the debasement, conniving and acting they have to do. It is rare that a person gets it, and rarer still that they are happy w/ the reality of the fame and issues that come along w/ the prize. Just like cheaters.



2 Comments (+add yours?)

  1. Paula
    Feb 21, 2010 @ 00:17:53

    You forget, Jem, the lure of reality tv includes the dramatic set ups created by producers, who goad the participants onward and into the situations. Affair partners, simply by embarking on an affair, have their own built in production team encouraging the drama as well.

    Cheaters and reality tv contestants alike grow to crave and need that drama, and can’t remember what life felt like without it. Why do you think so many people who had that spotlight go on to participate in different shows, and so many cheaters go on to cheat again? Those shows, and, in my experience, cheaters, like to talk up the “journey” they are taking, and how meaningful and important it is. And, in both cases, really, it’s not.


  2. Trackback: Brenchel- a study in the Affair Mindset « betrayed but recovering

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